Stubborn

Put into a corner, where the only thing left to do is to surrender.
Yet as stubborn as a mule, I refuse to take it before Him.
Why??
I refuse to let tears flow. I refuse to show that I am in someway hurt by it. And that although I know I shouldnt let it hurt me, the fact is I am.
Why should I get upset over something like that...why does it mean so much to me??
I'm tired of thinking...
I need need need to let it go.